Monday, October 12, 2015

Our New School Room.

In December last year we moved into our new home. The only room in the house which I could visualise was the study. I am not very good at decorating, but I knew what I wanted in this room! After nine years in a small, but beautiful 1906 Federation cottage, with no dedicated learning space, I was VERY excited about having a room to keep all our books in.  My photos don't do the space justice, but I did my best. It is my favourite room in the house.

Those who know me well, know I have a soft spot for buttons! 

Here is our read-aloud sofa. I wanted red to offset the blue walls, but I didn't expect it to take so long to find the right sofa. The first one I found sold out after I waited too long, another one we drove to Sydney to look at ended up being orange, despite the sales person describing it as red. This one we found locally, and I LOVE it. The vinal wall sticker was a little tricky to put up, buy with the help of my ever patient mother, we managed put on the wall without too much drama. I had planned to change it in a year or two, to a quote from St Catherine of Siena, but after the stress of getting it on the wall, I may rethink that plan!


Next to our sofa we is our book basket, featuring the very beautiful Treasure and Tradition book all about the Traditional Latin Mass.


In the wardrobe I have two of these great shelves from IKEA.


I know this is a terrible photo, but I wanted to include it to show the two images I have on our wall. The one on the right is our St. Anne and Our Lady, which I think is perfect for a homeschool room! The other is Our Lady of the Way, perhaps my favourite image of Our Lady. The crucifix was a gift to my husband when he entered the church. We have always had it in our bedroom, but the gold perfectly offset the blue of the walls, and this way I get to admire it several hours a day, rather than just a glance at bedtime!



So that is our school room. A tranquil little room away from the distractions of the rest of the home. I find that we get a lot more done when we spend our lesson time in this room. We are very blessed indeed.

Thursday, October 1, 2015

7 Quick Takes vol 5


We are at the end of term 3 school holidays. I have hardly seen my two eldest sons. In the first week of the holidays they attended a two night camp run by Youth Mission Team. During the this time Bilby called me to say there was another, longer camp running the following week in Canberra, which is a about seven hours south of us by train. I protested that they are already booked in to many Catholic camps this year, and perhaps they can't go to every wonderful thing on offer. In the end we relented, and they traveled by train with a local friend. I find it a little funny that my 17 and 15 year old sons aren't pushing to be allowed to go to parties, and concerts, but to as many Catholic camps as they can! We must have done somethings right.

Yesterday we caught up with friends from the upper Hunter. Roo has developed a friendship with one of their children, but at times it can be tenuous. I was a little worried that Roo would announce that he wanted nothing to do with said friend after a spat the last time they were together, when he repeatedly announced that the friendship was over. Thankfully it was all forgotten, and they had a great time together. We went to a trampoline park, home for a quick lunch, then a quick visit to the beach.
I've discovered that I can no longer eat potatoes. I suspected that I may have a problem with night shades, and have avoided then. After avoiding them for some weeks, I reintroduced them, and now know that they cause me trouble. I get an uncomfortable painful tender spot under my ribcage (liver perhaps?) and puffy eyes when I eat them.
Speaking of food, I have spent these holidays learning as much as I can about the GAPS diet. I've decided that Roo and myself, and hopefully Koala, will begin in the next few months. I am scared because its a big commitment, but also very excited because I know that it's going to help us in many ways. I'll be blogging about it when we begin.
Last month we attend the North Coast Catholic Homeschool Camp which was held in a new location near Coffs Harbour which meant we were able to drive there in one sitting rather than having to break it into two days of travelling. We had a lovely relaxed time. Koala had his first all nighter, which is a speciality of this camp for the older children. They even had the good fortune to see a wild platypus at 5am, which not many people can claim to have experienced.
Frances and Chris from The Culture Project spent the week with us at camp, which was a wonderful blessing! They have several sessions with the older children talking about chastity, abortion and so forth. Frances was homeschooled and attending the camp for many years with her family, so it was lovely to see her back witnessing to us all. She is an amazing young woman who is changing the world.
A few weeks ago I was pleasantly surprised when I asked Bilby if he would prefer to go to our local Novus Ordo Mass or attend the Traditional Latin Mass with Koala and myself. He chose the TLM. So much for traditional forms of worship not being engaging enough for modern young people!

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

Tuesday, September 29, 2015

The Many Moods of the Family Rosary.

Years ago I would often ask families whose children still practiced their faith, what they thought the secret was. More often than not the answer was praying the Rosary together, and so I decided we would too.

We go through phases of piety when we pray the rosary consistently after dinner, but to be honest over the years we haven't been as routine was I would like. I expect we are not alone in this! I have noticed a pattern has emerged in that we are more diligent after returning from homeschool camps, and when I have noticed a potential crisis of faith.

In the beginning when the children were little we struggled with inattention, arguments, refusal, whining, and super fast hail marys! It was years before Roo sat through a whole rosary with us. He would sit nearby colouring in, and later looking through faith based picture books. He has recently graduated to leading the fifth decade!

I often wondered if it was worth all the angst, but we pushed on through, despite the challenges. In the early years I would position myself between, Bibly and Koala, in order to nudge then when they repeatedly failed to open their mouths. I felt as thought most of the time my arms were twitching as I gently reminded my sons with my elbows!

My children came up with many ways to show their displeasure: back turning,  needing to go to the bathroom, needing  a drink, playing with the dogs when we forgot to remove them, complaining that Roo didn't have to join in, and speed praying to such an extent that it would difficult to figure out exactly what was being said! We have used a Rosary app with beautiful art work, but we had to cast this aside after arguments over the volume level, and children playing with the virtual beads.

We have had tears over whose turn it is to blow out the candle, the candle being snuffed with fingers and dipping ones fingers in the hot wax to make a mold.

Whilst increasing age has resulted in more compliance, my children still have a way to go. A recent tactic was the Mexican standoff, when one child refused to lead, and one parent refused to accept  their decision. We sat in silence for quite a while that night!

More often than not the rosary became a time to exercise parent self control!

In some ways we have come full circle, as a now pious child has become rather upset that his brother prays too fast. This is the very same child who excelled in seeing how fast he could lead a decade.

Occasionally the parent is the one to cause trouble.

I like to pray the rosary using a card which has art work to depict each mystery of the rosary. This particular card worked best when folded in a triangle shape sitting infront of me. Bilby tried and succeeded in knocking my card down with a gentle breath of air. For some inexplicable reason I chuckled, and so did my son, but it didn't stop there. I could NOT stop laughing. The kind of laughter that makes no sense, when tears roll down your face and you have no idea why you are laughing. I kept telling myself to stop, I was being immature, we should be PRAYING, but all to no avail. It was totally inappropriate, but gee it was so much fun!

You may think it odd that I have decided to post about our apparent failures in family prayer, but I don't see it that way. More often than not things go smoothly despite my litany of challenges. I have learned so much through our attempts to pray together. I know beyond any doubt that all been worthwhile. I firmly believe that we receive many graces through the act of prayer, not based on how we feel whilst praying.

Would you like to share your family prayer challenges with me? I dare you! You might just make someone feel more normal.


Thursday, July 16, 2015

7 Quick Takes Vol 4

7 Quick Takes 

1. We have been blessed to have the Traditional Latin Mass once again offered in our Diocese. The more I have the opportunity to hear Mass in the extraordinary form, the more I fall in love with it. It is becoming easier to follow, and the beauty of the liturgy has captured my heart. This love of the traditional Mass hasn't come quickly. I think many people claim to not like Latin Mass because they do not give it time. Being a lover of history, I enjoy knowing that the traditional Mass I am participating in is the same one which countless people over the centuries, and across the world have celebrated. If only people would look beyond their unfounded assumption that the traditional Mass is somehow a rejection of Vatican II, and that going to a Latin Mass means that you are somehow stuck in the past. That kind of false thinking drives me nuts!

2. Term 3 beings tomorrow, and I feel totally unprepared! The first week of the holidays I was recovering from having two wisdom teeth removed under a general anaesthetic. The second week saw us catching up with friends, and camping on the final weekend, when I should be planning! I find that I really need a short amount of time to just collect my thoughts about the coming term, and to put my plans on paper, even when those plans are often just a continuation of what we have already been doing, with just a little tweaking. 

This term however, I feel a little extra pressure as Bilby only has two terms before I think he will finish his home education journey. We will start Sonlight 20th Century World History, even though we may not finish it before he may begin studying at TAFE. I want to lap up the time we have with all three children at home together.

3. This week end Koala is visiting a friend in Canberra, and Bilby, is visiting a good friend in Goulburn. They were able to travel on the train together most of the way, which eased my anxiety about Koala taking his first big trip away. It occurred to me that with the older two boys away, James, Roo, and myself should go away too. I picked James up from work on Friday afternoon with the camper trailer attached to the car, and we had a week end in Port Stephens. It certainly is different with just one child. We have a lot more space, and less squabbling!

4. Bilby has been considering working in an early childhood setting. Last term he did some work experience at his old preschool, where some of the staff remembered him! He has always had an affinity with little ones, and he has enjoyed his time at the preschool. Perhaps study in this area is something he may consider next year.

5. My study is finally finished! The final touch was a wall sticker quote from a Robert Frost poem. "Two roads diverged in a wood, and I took the one less travelled by, and that has made all the difference."  I think this quote sums up our lives as Christians, and home educators. The other quote I nearly went with was from St Catherine of 
Siena, "If you are who you are meant to be you will set the whole world ablaze." I will definitely be using St Catherine's quote at a later date. I will post pictures of my beautiful study soon. It's my favourite room in our new home, and I just love having a dedicated homeschool room in which to put our books etc after years of schooling in our dining room.

6. Bilby has started to learn to drive. At first I had to push him to both get his licence, and to get behind the wheel, but now he is keen to get his hours up. Thus far it has been a pleasure, and much less stressful than I had been anticipating!

7. I am feeling very blessed at the moment as one of the children have come though a difficult period with his faith intact, and vastly strengthened. It has reminded me of how important suffering can be, and how we must lean into Our Lord when things get tough. I recall praying about this situation, when we were in the thick of it, and I felt God telling me that my son was still the same child despite the situation we were facing, and to not worry. Times when I feel God speaking to me are very rare, so this was precious. I held onto that knowing, when things were overwhelming. My prayers were answered, and my son, has emerged stronger, and with his faith renewed and redoubled! God is good, even in the midst of suffering.

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!


Monday, September 15, 2014

The Simple Woman's Daybook (vol1)

Here is my tweaked version of The Simple Woman's Daybook. I have borrowed a few of Erin's additions!

Outside My Window

The temperature has begun to rise, and the sun is appearing earlier which means I have started to walk again. I have really missed walking over winter, when it was too cold for me to go for an early walk, and when the motivation to go had evaporated by the time it warmed up.

I am thankful for

My level of energy. Now that my health has started to improve, I seem to be able to stay up longer when there is something to stay up for, and not pay for it all the following day. A few night ago I sat up until midnight researching a new history curriculum, and the next day I felt only slightly tired rather than wiped out.

I am going

This evening I am going to my friend Fiona's home to see a demo of the new model Thermomix.

I am reading

Postcard From The Volcano by Lucy Becket. I am enjoying it enormously. Wishing I had more time to devote to it though. I think it will take a another few weeks to finish.

I am looking forward to

Taking our new camper trailer away for 5 nights. We are only going local as James has no leave, so we are staying close to his work, which is close to the wonderful holiday location of Port Stephens. I'm planning to read a lot, both for myself, and to the boys.

I am pondering

How fast time goes, and how little time I have left to achieve all that I want to with Roo, before his formal education is over. Looking back to when the older boys were his age, I see that I let time slip away, and didn't get around to doing some of the things I wanted to, such as art appreciation and creation, living the liturgical year etc. I am trying to be more intentional with these things for Roo.

I am listening to

Conversations With Richard Fidler. This morning while walking I listened to an interview about great speeches. Right up my alley.

I am struggling

With patience. Both with the children, and with wanting to achieve more from my to do list.

Celebrating the liturgical year

Yesterday Roo watched the video Sunday Mass preparation video from Holy Heroes, and colouring sheet. I intended to make very simple crosses (Feast of The Exaltation of the Cross) made by cutting wafer biscuits, but we arrived home too late from Life Teen Mass to have dessert, so we did it today. It was certainly simple enough!

I am praying

For my Mother-in-law's companion who has been diagnosed with cancer, and for my sister-in-laws step daughter whose brain tumor has returned. We only found out today. We also continue to pray for Christians in the middle east.

A favourite quote for today

"Since Christ Himself has said, "This is My Body" who shall dare to doubt that it is His Body?" St Cyril of Jerusalem.

A few plans for the rest of the week

On Friday we are finishing the term by visiting fellow homeschool friends who are hosting a morning tea for Catherine Hamlin's hospital in Ethiopia. Roo is really looking forward to seeing his friend Joseph, and playing in their lovely garden which he is very fond of!

A peek into my day

This was taken two weeks ago at the North Coast Catholic Homeschool camp. We had a fantastic time!




Wednesday, September 10, 2014

7 Quick Takes (vol 3)

I know it's been a year between posts, but this time I am determined to get back into blogging. I've cleaned out my Face Book friends and pages, and I am intending to spend my net time in the blogosphere.
We have just returned from the North Coast Catholic Homeschoolers camp, and I am feeling refreshed, and energised. I love that I always feel enthused and ready for change, after I return from camp. Having time away to pray, ponder, and connect with like minded families, allows me the time to reassess where we are headed, and to make a few changes. I am feeling that there are not enough free hours in the day at the moment to accomplish all that is on my to do list!
We are building a house, which we should be moving into by the end of November! After a VERY slow start it is taking shape, and we are starting to get excited about this new time on our lives. I'll blog about this in more detail later, as what we are doing is somewhat unconventional.
In preparation for said house, we have started to look at new furniture. Last night we put a deposit on our very first new lounge, which is rather exciting! The house will also have a dedicated study, for us to put all our educational supplies and curriculum rather than our dining room doubling as a work space, as it is now. I am sooo excited about this room! Its the only room in the house that I know EXACTLY how I want it to look. I have started to look for a lounge and desk for this study (I don't like the word study, but schoolroom isn't right either. Any suggestions?).
In the last few months I have removed dairy from my diet, and I am loving the results. I no longer get a runny nose in the morning, headaches, or find it difficult to get moving in the morning. I has been VERY difficult to give up cappuccino, yoghurt, and cheese, but I just love the way I feel. I recently did a trial, and my eye puffed up, I had a headache, and felt terrible for most of the morning, so I know that I can no longer eat dairy. I small price to pay for feeling great!
I've discovered Jo Witton's Quirky Cooking cook book, which as made the whole dairy free process so much more enjoyable. Macadamia "cheese" is fantastic, as is her dairy free custard made with coconut milk.
I am just loving life at the moment! The challenges faced by one of the boys this time last year have mostly been resolved which is a huge load of the family shoulders. Everyone is in a good place, and life is good. Feeling extremely blessed!
For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

Thursday, September 26, 2013

7 Quick Takes (vol. 2)


Recently I took Roo off to get a haircut, which is always an interesting experience! I can't help but remember the time, not too long ago when a hair cut was a traumatic experience for both Roo and myself. These days a little discomfort shows on his face for only a few minutes before he settles in for a good long chat with Dave the barber. This time, one of the many topics Roo covered was his favourite ABC3 TV show,  Splat-A-Lot. Roo suggested that Dave should watch it. Roo informed Dave that it would make his life better! He also told him that he would have to watch it after attending Mass, as it begins at 11am! Listening to Roo chatting away in the barber's chair always brings a smile to my face.
This week we finally made a pilgrimage to St Mary of the Cross' tomb at Mary MacKillop place. I believe that when one goes on a pilgrimage there are meant to be crosses, or little sufferings to offer up. Our little trip was no exception. Let's just say that we experienced a little difficulty with one of our modes of transport. Some of us alighted the train at a particular stop, others of us did not! We eventually arrived at North Sydney, and were able to spend some time in prayer before the tomb of Australia's first canonized saint.

On the way home I mentioned to one of the children that as I knelt down to pray (with said child), I became overwhelmed with emotion and began to cry. This surprised me, as I had prayed with one of the others boys a few minutes before, and was underwhelmed, but this time bam, tears began to flow, which is very unusual for me. My son quickly looked at me, and said that he had experienced the same thing, and had been crying too!

I would love to go back again soon as our visit was rather short. It's such a beautiful setting with the lovely gardens , and old buildings in the heart of the city, yet set apart from it.
The day we left for our holiday my beloved coffee machine broke down! It had served us faithfully for 6 years. Every day at morning tea time I would stop and make myself a cappuccino.  I am not a huge coffee drinker, but love a well made cappuccino once a day.

We have upgraded to a more fancy model, which has required a little more skill than simply pressing a few buttons! I am beginning to understand why it is so difficult to get a truly good coffee. After many failures, I am on my way towards figuring out how to pull a 30 second shot of espresso every time. Having a streak of perfectionism (especially in regard to coffee) is proving to be a time consuming business, but an enjoyable one all the same.
Yesterday Bilby came home from the Aspect Siblings camp. I'm sure he had a great time, but as he didn't get to sleep until after 2am on the final morning he hasn't been able to give me much information as yet!

While we were picking him up, and watching the little presentation put on my the children, we saw the first teacher Roo had when he went to the Aspect school. It was so lovely to see him chatting to her, and reminiscing about the good old days in Blue class!
Every time we attend a Catholic Homeschool camp I come home with a case of baby envy, or more accurately large family envy! James came with us to the last camp, and he came home with a dose too. I just love watching how the children in large families interact with one another.
Today Roo finished book 1 of All About Spelling. He has really enjoyed this programme, and feels a great sense of achievement at having finished the book. Before we went on holiday, I had to convince him not to take it away with us so that he could finish quicker! Book 2 here we come.
In an effort to strengthen my back, which keeps going out resulting in my having to spend 2-3 days lying flat, I have decided that I need to do some exercise. I tried Pilates with a physiotherapist, which was great, but is very expensive, so I am looking into other options. My motivation is lacking. It's just not my thing, but better than the alternative I guess!
For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

Tuesday, September 24, 2013

September Photo Journal

We have not long arrived home from a mini holiday, and the North Coast Catholic Homeschool camp, where Roo made his First Holy Communion.

Ready to recieve First Holy Communion.

It's difficult to get everyone looking their best!
 The medal  Roo is wearing belonged to my maternal Grandmother, who wore it on her First Holy Communion day, which is rather a special thing to still have, and be able to use. I was a little nostalgic on the day as Roo, is probably the last child I will prepare to receive First Holy Communion.
 After camp we spent some time with our good friends Sonia and Patrick and their beautiful family.

Bilby and our Godson. All the little ones just love Bilby. He is fantastic with little ones.
We spent a day at Dreamworld, and I am happy to say that  being over 40 has not stopped me from indulging in my passion for thrill rides! With the exception of rides that spin. Koala takes after me, which meant we spent most of the day together on some very scary rides. We had a blast! The photo below was taken on our last visit when Koala was just 5. The look on his face in the photo is priceless!
Koala aged 5. One of my all time favorite photos!
 We just had to take the photo again, 8 year later!

Koala ages 13
 We had a great time away!

Saturday, August 31, 2013

Questioning The System.

A close friend of mine is considering home educating one of her five children as he has been struggling at school. As I have encouraged her that she can do  it, and calmed her many fears, I have been able to reflect upon how very dependent we are on the system to educate our children. This lady is highly educated, yet she doubts her ability to educate her nine year old son!

The experience has reminded me of the huge divide there is between those with kids in the school system, and the rest of us. It really is a total paradigm shift. After over eight years of home educating I now know that terms like "behind" and "failure" are only useful in a classroom setting. Just as I know the sun will rise, I know that my children are just where they need to be, and I am able to totally ignore the guidelines of the education department, and some members of my family and society at large, who would think that my children are "behind" in some areas, and that "they should be able to ..." They do not measure success the way that I, and most homeschool families do. My children are thriving, and have their self esteem intact as they are not forced to compare themselves with other children their age on a daily basis. I fully remember feeling as she does, and asking myself all those questions. Am I capable, what about maths, and university entrance, will they fall behind, and on and on, and on.

Attempting deschool a someone in a few phone calls and emails is a tough ask! She is not closed off to my opinions, which I know must sound strange and perhaps even slightly radical. I can imagine the confusion of being advised to allow your child seemingly do nothing for a few months when you have been told he is struggling at school! Being told that the final year of school is irrelevant to getting a place at university must come as a shock after a lifetime of being told how crucial it is.

I will continue to challenge her beliefs, and encourage her to question why it is that the education department's standards are her yard stick of success, and why she feels incapable when all evidence points to her competence. And I will continue to be thankful that I am able to see the world through the lens of home education.  

7 Quick Takes (volume 1)


In an attempt to get back into blogging, I thought I would have a go at 7 Quick Takes. Here goes!
Since I last blogged we have had some changes in our family life. Roo, is now homeschooled. I absolutely LOVE having him at home. He is thriving, and I am so much more relaxed than I was when Bilby first came home. No changing curriculum and stressing over getting it right. I now have the experience and confidence to relax and enjoy the time I have with my youngest! Last week I complimented him on having learned all the phonograms on his All About Spelling chart, to which he replied "I'm so good!" I just love the self believe kids at this age have.
Koala, on the other hand has returned to school. I firmly believe that he is right where he needs to be, and I have once more learned to never say "I will never..." He is thriving, but I miss him terribly.
Today I was able to spend a few hours with my dear friend Tanya, whom I haven't seen for a while as she is hard at work with her university studies. Tanya is a real inspiration to me as she has so much energy and passion for Our Lord, her family, and her career.
In a few days we leave for a little holiday, and we are really looking forward to it! We will be relaxing by the beach in our little camper trailer for a few days, before attending a Catholic Homeschool camp, then visiting dear friends in Brisbane, then a day at a Gold Coast theme park to indulge Koala and my passion for roller coasters!
At the moment I am listening to "The Book Thief" on my Ipod which I am really enjoying. Audio books certainly make house work a who;le lots more enjoyable! We have recently discovered Audible. Bilby, Roo and I have been listening to lots of great books. I must say it makes reading aloud easier!
Fathers Day is tomorrow. DVDs seem to be the theme this year. Bilby remembered that James has often commented that he would like The Princess Bride on DVD, which we found despite my belief that it was inconceivable that we would be able to find it (sorry I couldn't resist). Then Roo saw The Incredibles which is James favourite kids movie. Koala's gift will be to help me cook James a special breakfast of poached eggs with smoked salmon and hollandaise sauce.
For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

Tuesday, March 26, 2013

It's Almost April.

This April you may notice that the world turns a little blue. April is Autism Awareness month. The Sydney Opera House will be lit up blue, Newcastle's City Hall clock tower will be blue, and some of your Facebook friends might be sporting ASD profile badges. Now you may be about to switch off, close my page, or groaningly say something like "Not another worthwhile cause to think about." Well please don't. Let me tell you why it is so very important to use April to learn a little something about Autism Spectrum Disorders.

You may not have a family member with an ASD, but I am sure that someone in the circle of your acquaintance is touched by autism. Perhaps it's a friends child, someone at church, or in your homeschool group.These people need you to know a little about autism so that they feel supported, accepted and understood. All too often families touched by autism feel rejected and misunderstood simply because people do not have a basic understanding of what ASD can mean.

Even in my own extended family there is limited understanding of what autism is, and how it impacts my children. I totally understand why this is the case. Autism can be difficult to pin down! You might know a person on the spectrum, and therefore think you know what autism is. You couldn't be more wrong! If you take something away from my post let it be this quote. "To know a person with autism, is to know ONE person with autism." My own two children with ASD are poles apart in how autism effects them.

Roo didn't speak fluently until he was about four and a half.
Koala spoke right on time.
Roo's sensory system needs a lot of movement. His engine is often running fast.
Koala's sensory system is under sensitive. He likes to be quiet and still.
Roo is very agile and walked right on cue.
Koala has low muscle tone and walked at 22 months.
Roo has never had a meltdown
Koala has frequent meltdowns

I could go on and on, but you get the picture.

So this April I will be writing a few short posts about autism. I invite you to come back and learn a little more about ASD, and celebrate (yes you read that right!) the diversity of autism!

Monday, November 12, 2012

For The Love of Books


Ever since I was a little girl I have always had a fascination with books. When I was in grade two, I remember looking with longing at the book my best friend, Kim, was reading. A real chapter book with a pink cover and an image of a girl on roller skates. Heaven for a little girl in the 70's!I desperately wanted to be able to read that book, but I knew it was above my abilities at the time. Unfortunately I wasn't a child who picked reading up easily.

Books have always held a strong attraction for me. I loved the book catalogues that came home from school. I loved book shops, and buying books even when I knew I probably wouldn't read them because they were too difficult. As a teenager I made sure that my books weren't dog eared, and I read them so that the spine wouldn't crease! My books were my treasures. When  I was supposed to be doing my maths homework I would set the textbook, exercise book, and pencil upon the bed covers with the doona neatly folded back so that I could quickly stash my novel under the covers and assume a studious expression if someone approached the door!

When I became a mum I knew that I wanted my children to love reading as I did. With Bilby, I knew it wouldn't be too difficult. The first time he saw a book he was hooked! His face lit up, and his little legs did the happy dance. He LOVED being read too. Unfortunately Koala was the total opposite. He hated being read to and wouldn't stand for it!

Like me, Bilby, wasn't a natural reader, and  while he enjoys reading, it's not *yet* his favourite activity! I am firmly convicted that if he had stayed at school he would detest reading as many boys do.When he was in kindergarten he would leave his reader at school and tell me that his teacher didn't want them to read it! Looking back he just wasn't ready to begin the reading process, but the expectations of school meant that he was pushed before he was ready which resulted in him beginning to think that he wasn't good at reading. I believe that many, many boys are turned off reading because they are pushed into it before they are ready, and because the way literature is pulled apart at school, is often enough to turn boys off.


My fondest memory of the short time I was a classroom teacher was when I had the privilege to teach  English to a wonderful group of year nine kids. This particular school tried to make the bottom class very small, so that the kids got extra attention. I started with a class of twelve kids which dwindled for various reasons to about eight or nine. I decided that we would begin each lesson with 10-15 minutes of silent reading of a book of their choosing. I wasn't sure how it would go as many of these kids really struggled with reading and writing, but they happily bought along their books each lesson which in itself was an achievement. There was complete silence as each child enjoyed their choice. I was so excited for them, as it was often difficult to get these kids engaged in learning. I was able to sit at the front of the room and enjoy the scene before me. I just loved watching their faces as they read! One boy choose a book about a female wrestler! It was a big book, and at first I wondered if it would prove too difficult for him, but as the weeks passed he kept at at, and I was rewarded with hearing him excitedly comment to one of his friends as he left the room "That's the first book I've ever read." I felt like doing the happy dance and shouting for joy! I believe they learned more in that fifteen minutes a day than anything else I tried to "teach" them.

When I watch Bilby quietly reading I am often reminded of that year nine class. He could have been one of those kids who never picked up a book. But homeschooling has meant he has been able to come to reading in his own time, and enjoy many books without me sucking the joy out of them by making a lesson out of the plot, characters, and so on. In the last year, Bilby has read over a dozen books. Books on World Wars 1 and 2, books about modern day refugees, historical fiction, and a book about a war dog.  For a boy who once found reading a chore it makes me want to do the happy dance and shout for joy all over again!




 

Wednesday, November 7, 2012

Good Goats!



This morning I had a few errands that needed doing, one of which was a visit to my local pathology office to organise some tests. The receptionist knows me, from years of visits, and she asks, "Are you still homeschooling, Trish?" I answer in the affirmative.

"Gee you're good." she responds " You must have to be so organised. I guess you have to do the same thing at a set time. It must be so difficult."

In my mind I see the image she imagines. Perhaps a room dedicated to schooling, a white board, me standing in front of the boys presenting a lesson, engaged and eager students, a tidy and well organised home.

For a moment I wonder if I should attempt to shatter her illusions, and tell her that it's not as difficult as she might imagine. Another image flashes before my eyes. As this moment one of my sons is no doubt lying on his bed doing "nothing". He will probably doing doing "nothing" for quite some weeks, until boredom takes over, and he finds some motivation, or when takes an interest in my strewing and suggestions . I picture earlier days of high stress, much shouting and defiance which went hand in hand with any maths questions, and most of the other "lessons" I attempted to force my son to complete.

I judge it best to keep my mouth shut on both counts, and allow the lady before me to keep her equilibrium! I imagine her reaction if she knew the truth. Even to tell her of how my eldest son spends his days, would be pointless. She would have no frame of reference in which to place the activities which makes up his days. A few maths questions, lots of read-alouds, reading for pleasure, a little science and copywork. How can outsider accurately imagine the flow of a home in which school is absent?

On my way home I once again think that home educators really are like goats. We refuse to go with the crowd like sheep, but stubbornly do our own thing in the face of a society which would like everyone to believe that there is only one way to educate a child. We question the norms, and cut a new path. I believe that home educators do this better than any other group I can think of. Let everyone else follow the school model. We'll take the path less travelled by!

Last night I was struck by how different my educational paradigm is from schooling parents. Bilby attends a Catholic youth group called Life Teen, and last night parents were encouraged to come along to hear about an upcoming retreat. Several times I heard how parents were not happy with the date chosen which happened to be the week end before exams begin. Not the HSC, but exams for years 8, 9 and 10. In my mind insignificant exams which no one will care about the week after they are finished! Yet the fun and spiritual growth to be had on the retreat will probably be remembered fondly, and drawn on for years to come! One parent shared with me that they originally were not going to allow their child to attend because of these exams, until her tears changed their minds. I looked at my son, and was so grateful that he has no concept of what an exam is. He has never had to worry where he will be ranked in relation to 150 other children his age, and judge his worthiness based on his results.


Parents who hadn't met me before questioned me about how I would manage high school, and the HSC. Hopefully I opened a door for one mum to see the final year of school in a different light. As is often the case, she seemed a little surprised when I said that there are many avenues into university. She agreed with me that too much pressure is placed on kids, and that she remembered asking people what mark they got in the HSC for some time after, and pigeon holing them based on their response.

So I am happy to associate myself with the noble goat! Funnily enough I even live on Nanny Goat Hill, a local nickname given to the hill on which I live, and where my own father played in freedom as a child, and where goats of the fury, and two legged kind still live and play today!

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

At The Beach.

Today I persuaded Koala to come to the dog beach with Bilby and I. Usually when we suggest such an outing he's not too keen. With a little gentle coaxing, the promise of a short stay, and ice cream on the way home, Bilby and I triumphed! We took our very timid one year old dog Peaches with us. As it was mid week we thought she might be less overwhelmed by lots of huge dogs anxious to play with her. The weather was also perfect!

In theory it sounded great, until an over sized boxer puppy came over to greet Peaches. She was so terrified she tried to swim out to Bilby! She spent the rest of our visit at my side refusing to play, even with the smallest of dogs.

What would a trip to the beach be without a water fight!

We didn't think the water would be warm enough for swimming, so no rash shirts. The boys however braved  it, and even went for a  proper swim!


Hopefully there will be many more days like this. We even did some cooking earlier in the day, complete with thickening cream the old fashioned way. With six arms between us, it didn't take long! So in one day we have achieved many of the things I was hoping for in my last post! 

Saturday, October 27, 2012

Step away from the curriculum!

Well my attempts to move towards unschooling have been a failure! I am finding it so very difficult to let go and trust that relinquishing control over Koala's learning will not ruin his life!

Today I realised that I have not yet come to a strong conclusion as to where I sit on the home education continuum. I have constantly vacillated between methodologies without having a firm opinion as to which one I believe in most strongly. They all sound so worthy and interesting! The only style I have never tried is unit studies! Natural learning holds a strong attraction for me, but why can't I just get on with it!

Of course I know why. I'm ashamed to admit the reasons because I know that they are not valid, but the fear is still there whether or not I agree with the principles of unschooling. So here are my fears. Perhaps if I share them they will dissipate. (not likely but worth a try!)

If I allow Koala to unschool, I worry that he will do nothing for months. Just the thought of it, and I can feel my anxiety rise. As it is he is content to sit and wait for hours, doing nothing before gaming time begins. On Sunday, our gaming free day, he is lost!

What if he never learns the basics well enough to succeed. I do believe that when children and adults want to learn something they will, if they have been given the tools to learn, but...

Will he blame me for not having made him do enough. For giving into his anxiety over certain things rather than gently pushing on through.

I'll get the whole unschooling thing wrong. I'll allow my lazy tendencies to mean that I won't strew enough interesting things along his path.

It just sounds like so much more hard work than other methods of education. The parent has to be on the job all the time. Constantly thinking of ways to engage their children.

So these are just some of my fears. But I have decided that on Monday things will be very different. I will only ask Koala to do the following:
Sit and listen to a read-aloud about St. Dominic Savio, and  continue our reading of Acts of the Apostles, copy out his spelling words, and a small passage of copywork, continue to read "Then" with me. That's it! If he wants to do a chapter of Life of Fred, great. If not no problem. The same applies to listening to The Rangers Apprentice on audio book.

I want connection and joy to be our most important goals. The curriculum of conversation! I want to see my little boy smile more, and confide in me more. I want him to know that he is loved, respected and supported in the significant challenges he is facing. I want us cook something yummy together. I would like him to want go to the beach, or rock climbing, or explore the bush behind our house, or any number of other activities. I want him to explore things that interest him. But if he doesn't do any of these things on Monday, or for the rest of the year, that will be ok.

As for me, I want to let go and feel that it is safe to do so. To be released from the fear that I'm stuffing it all up!

I'll keep you posted!


P.S. The previous two posts were written some time ago, but I wasn't ready to post them in case I decided it was all a big mistake!



What I'm Learning.

Well it's been two weeks since we changed direction. It would be incorrect to say we are unschooling, but I keep refering back to this "When pressed, I define unschooling as allowing children as much freedom to learn in the world, as their parents can comfortably bear."So by that definition we are on the road, and moving forward.

We still do some bookwork because there are some things I am not prepared to give up at this point because I know that they are helping. Koala also needs some structure as we transition to a more relaxed approach. He has been very anxious lately when the boundaries aren't clearly defined, so structure is important for him.

The main thing I have noticed is that both the children and myself are much more relaxed. I am making a huge effort to put any anxiety about what we "should" be doing, behind me. I'm looking for more opportunities that are fun, or at least different from what we are used to. For example this week we went to see the Archibald Prize at the art gallery. The boys were underwhelmed, and keen to go way before I was, but it was something different that I took time to do, rather than thinking we should do that and not following through. Yesterday I helped Bilby make a cake. Yes it took a lot longer than if I had done it, but I was relaxed enough to not be bothered about the time taken or the mess because I wasn't stressing about all the things on the list that I thought we "should" be doing. We spent a bit if time on the Brain Pop app which led to discussions about  WW2, and we read a picture book I have about the one women's experience of the bombing of Hiroshima, "My Hiroshima." Bilby went off to watch a few more Brain Pop annimations and take the quizzes! All without me worring about what we weren't doing from the dreaded *list*.

Why was I so bent on sticking so closely to formal school type learning? Well there were two reasons. I was so up tight about how "behind" we were that I felt like I couldn't give up the bookwork type things we did in favour of more fun relaxed experiential learning. I had the mindset that it was all up to me. If I didn't make them do x y z then I had failed my children. This year I have been able to see the foolishness of this way of thinking. My children will be who they are, no matter what I try and *make* them learn. The second reason is that I'm not a very hands on type person. I loved university lectures where I could sit and take notes and just drink in the information presented to me. Some of my fondest memories of my time at university are of inspiring lectures where I would be furiously taking notes, or when I was inspired by the way a lecturer conveyed his or her passion. My least favourite times were when I was in a classroom! Hands on activities were far less interesting to me. This is the same for me today. I love nothing more than sitting down with a book, listening to an interesting radio interview or watching a documentary. In fact I recently realised how often I say to the boys "I watched a documentart once..."

At the head level I was convicted of the common sence that came from a natural learning standpoint, but it scared the hell out of me. How could I let go without being consumed with fear that I was letting my children down if they couldn't do certain things at the level I thought they should? I respected and valued the unschoolers in my circle. I even envied them their calm relaxed lifestyle, but I couldn't become one of them. But times have changed and I'm ready to take on some elements of the unschooling lifestyle.

I have decided that it's well and truely time for me to take a risk and try something new. To open myself up to more fun and less structure. I have a list (some habits are hard to break!) of things I would like to do with the boys that are different from what we used to do all day, and I'm making suggestions to the boys of things they might like to try. I am really excited by the change in our atmosphere, and where it will take us.

A New Direction

I have on occassion been accussed of being stubborn! Most people who have a passing acquaintance with me will use words like "gentle, quiet, and calm" when describing me. And they would be right. Those words do accurately describe my character, but not all of it. I can be quietly (and sometimes not so quietly!) pig headedly stubborn. Those closest to me have seen the side I rarely reveal to the masses. I can doggedly hold my ground long after a more reasonable person would have stood down! My journey on the homeschooling road has been no different.

Many of you will relate to times in your life when the Holy Spirit, or someone close to you suggests you try something new, but you resist. Perhaps you have flirted with the new idea, played with it, tried it out briefly only to put it back on the shelf, where it can be mostly ignored until the next time the Holy Spirit, gently urges you to reconsider, and the whole dance begins again.

This is the relationship I have had with unschooling. I have always largely agreed with natural learning, but have never been able to let go and put it into practice. There have been times over that last six and a half years where I have decided that I would probably try unschooling. I held it in my hands for a little while, but put it back on the shelf before I ever really took the plunge. It has been there on the shelf calling to me where I have convienently ignored it.

It is currently fed up with my total lack of response, and has started rudely shouting at me to get attention, and for once I am really listening. I have taken it down from the top shelf and am determined to give it my full attention. I've wrapped it around me, and will not put it down.

Perhaps this isn't the best analagy, but I'll use it all the same! You get the idea.

This year feels like a turning point for us. I've come to some important conclusions about homeschooling and my relationship to it. When we started all those years ago I bought into the idea that homeschooling would magically mean my children would thrive academically. Haven't we all read the reports which sprout that home educated children score a year or two higher on academic testing, or some such generalisation? Well then, I reasoned, so would my children. After all I was passionate about learning. How could my children not excel with one on one mum time.

What I forgot was that my children would be exactly who they were created to be no matter how academic *I* wanted them to be. I am ashamed to say that it took me too long to give up my desire for them to be sitting around reading Tolkien all day!

Things have come to head in recent weeks in such a way that I need to act. One of our children is facing some huge challenges, and my dogged attachment to school type endeavours is only adding to his anxiety, and in turn to the anxiety of everyone in the family.

So here we go! Jumping off into unschooling. I've rejoined a few unschooling email groups, bought a few unschooling books and prayed a lot. I can't say that what we will be doing will be pure unschooling, but most of it will have that flavour. I'm not bothered by labels. We'll just be doing it, and not worrying what to call it!

In devouring Suzie Andres' book A Little Way of Homeschooling over the week end, I have come away with one word. Gentleness. That's what we all need around here.

The second reading at Mass today also really resonated with me:
You must give up your old way of life, you must put aside your old self. Ephesians 4:22

So most of the following posts will be my attempt to record and sort through the changes to our days.

Here goes...

Monday, August 20, 2012

A Wicked Explanation!




Koala has something of a sweet tooth. On a recent trip to the bulk foods warehouse he spent his money on a box of Wicked Fizz bars. I discovered that the way my children reacted to to experience of the lolly was a wonderfully simple way to explain how kids on the spectrum process sensory information.

Roo is highly orally sensitive. Brushing his teeth is hugely difficult for him. We brush his teeth as quickly as possible while he squeals the whole time. We have a glass of water ready for spitting, and the milk on the bench so that he can have a drink straight away to remove the taste of the toothpaste. We use plain toothpaste as he has a strong aversion to anything minty. As a baby he wasn't much of a chewer, which has carried over into his growing years in that he tends not to put much of anything in his mouth, even food!


Koala on the other hand always chewed whatever was at hand. When he was anxious it was clothes which he could chew a hole in with astonishing rapidity. (As a  Winnie The Pooh fan I just had to use those last two words!) Lots of our Lego is unusable as Koala would chew on a piece whilst building. On the whole Koala is hypo-sensitive (under sensitive) to most stimuli. I've blogged in the past about his being unaware of his shoes being on the wrong foot and so forth.


Bilby is neither hyper or hypo sensitive. His sensory system  is just right. Neither to fast or slow.


So back to the Wicked Fizz. Roo wanted to try one, but after a few licks he said he didn't want it and sat very quietly on the lounge licking his lips looking rather uncomfortable. The fizzy sensation was just too much for him. I them asked Bilby what his reaction to the lolly was? Was it a little too fizzy for him? He explained he liked the lolly but it was a little too fizzy for his tastes, but it didn't bother him at all. I then asked Koala who replied that he felt that it was slightly fizzy, but it wasn't uncomfortable at all.


I thought that this example of my children's reactions was a great way to explain what can be a difficult concept to grasp for those who don't have children with sensory processing issues, especially as I have the full gamut of sensory responses in my children from extreme aversion through to under sensitivity. Who would have thought that a hunble lolly could be so useful!

Saturday, December 31, 2011

No, I Do Not Need A Break!

I have often wondered why almost everyone who does not homeschool their children seem to think two things about me. One, that I must be saintly to want to spend all day, every day with my children, and two, that I need a break from them as often as possible in order to maintain my sanity. People worry about me, and enquire with concerned looks as to how often I am able to get away for a break from my children. I do enjoy time on my own, but it is not a pressing need that must be met on a weekly basis! People often exclaim that they could never do what I do, and often say that being with their children all day would drive them crazy! But do they react in the same way to women who work full time?


I know from experience that what I do day in and day out, is a walk in the park compared to going out to work full time. I no longer rush around packing lunches, arranging child care, making sure the washing is out before 7am, rush in the door in the evening to put on dinner and to find that by the children's bed time I haven't spent so much as ten minutes with my children. I do not need to sit up into the small hours marking exams, writing reports or planning lessons as I did when I worked as a high school English and History teacher.


Back then no one ever insisted that I needed to get away, despite the fact that as a teacher I spent most of my day with children, exactly as I do now! No one looked at me with pity or incredulity because they couldn't imagine how I could possibly manage! After six years of astounded looks, and concern for my lack of "me time" I feel for women who work full time. Do people continually question their ability to cope with the obvious demands of a forty hour week, and caring for their home and family? Do people genuinely believe that what I do as a homeschooler is so much more challenging than full time employment that it warrants all the concern and worry? Why wasn't I overwhelmed with concerns for my welfare when I was teaching other people's children all day?


There simply can be no comparison between what I do all day, and what women who work full time do during their days. I do not need to rush in the morning, I have no deadlines except for arriving at archery on time one morning a week, and Mass on a Sunday. I am able to leisurely learn with my children, enjoy their company (yes it is possible!) and keep house at the same time, whilst in my pyjamas if I feel like it!


I have lived both realities, and I know which is easier. We may have less money, but we certainly have more than enough despite one modest income. We do not go without, and excepting a small mortgage, we have no debt. So where is the need for concern? I lead a blessed life which I wish more women could share in.
The only conclusion I can come to is that many dislike children so much that the thought that someone would gladly choose to teach their children at home is incomprehensible to them. One only has to reflect on how many people put off having children so that they can "have a life" as if a full life is impossible once one is "burdened" with children.


I find it indescribably sad that people would think that choosing to be with my children each day could be anything other than what it is. An incredibly privileged and joyful experience. My children are not a burden, and I most certainly do not need a break from them!

Sunday, July 3, 2011

A Little Different.

When I was growing up, there were two things about me that were different. The first being that I am an only child. Back in the 1970s and 80s this made me something of an oddity! The most common reaction I received was jealously! This was an emotion which I most definitely did not understand as I was desperate for a sibling.


The second thing was less talked about. I was born with a cleft lip and palate. Growing up I was painfully aware that I looked a little different from other children. I was teased on several occasions, but the worst I can remember was the rather dull offering of "fat lip" by a rather fat boy in sixth class! The main source of my discomfort was the knowledge that I did look different. When I thought about my appearance I wondered what people thought of me, and if they would like me despite my difference. Being of a naturally shy disposition didn't help my lack of self-esteem.


I was aware that I was somewhat lucky when compared with other children born with the same condition. My cleft is unilateral, rather than bilateral, and I had enough skin on my upper lip to form a not too thin top lip. The thing which gave me the most discomfort was the base of my nose which, like most with a cleft lip, is somewhat out of alignment!


The times I felt most different were when I looked at my pre-operation baby photos. It was a little confronting to remember that the unattractive baby in the photos was me! My parents wisely did not hide the photos from me, and answered all my questions. At the time I wasn't aware that there are countless children in poverty stricken countries who did not have access to the surgery that made me just like everyone else. Now I am acutely aware how fortunate I was to be born in a country were I had the opportunity to lead a totally normal life.


As a teen and young adult I did at times wonder if I was pretty enough for someone to really love me, but it wasn't something I ruminated on. The only other time I gave it much thought was during pregnancy when I breathed a slight of relief as the stenographer showed us our baby's fully formed lip!


So today when a lady at church nervously approached me to discuss my lip I was reminded of what it means to be born a little different. This lady has an adult son with a cleft lip and palate and she wanted to affirm and encourage me which was lovely! Her son had a more difficult time of it than me, as he had less bone in his upper jaw and was bullied more than myself. She also related the story of a man who approached her to ensure that she did not shun her son as he had been shunned by his parents, who were embarrassed by his appearance. When I hear stories like these I am reminded of my blessed I have been!